Moving from the therapist chair to the client seat can be tricky sometimes

When you’re a therapist looking for a therapist, your own experience and knowledge in the field can both help and hinder the process. It can also be challenging to find a good therapist fit - someone who can both respect and incorporate your own expertise in this field, while also providing the insights and challenges to your self-examination that you can’t provide yourself.

Seeking couples therapy as a therapist can also feel particularly vulnerable, as it means you are letting a colleague in the field have an intimate view into your relationship and daily life. 

I have worked with many fellow therapists in the field, both in couples and individual work, and mindfully pursue the balance of respecting your expertise while also challenging you to grow and develop. I appreciate the trust that is placed in me when I’m sitting in the room with a fellow therapist engaging in the vulnerable act of therapy.

Common dynamics unique to couples therapy when you’re a therapist

 

Feeling your partner is less equipped to navigate conflict and emotions than you

Feeling dismissed when you try to communicate because your partner thinks you are “therapizing” them

finding yourself in an unbalanced caregiving role in your relationship or family

Feeling shame, embarrassment, or frustration regarding your own behavior in your relationship (especially given your training)

Concern that by seeking therapy for your relationship, your therapist may judge you or form a negative opinion of you as a fellow clinician

a sense of emotional exhaustion or impacts of secondary trauma that impact your emotional bandwidth for your family or relationship

Overleaning on your clinical brain and not being connected to your own vulnerability or emotional needs in your relationship